So if I kill someone and choose not to do it again, it's wrong to call me a murderer?Labelling is bad.
If somebody stole something - that's a thing they did and they can choose not to do it again.
If you tell somebody they are a thief then that's a label. They are a thief, they steal things, that's what they do.
Words have power. Use them wisely.
So, likewise., you will not be able to praise the child either.
Next you will be saying that we can't call them BOY or GIRL as that also adds a label.
A good telling off and the occasional kick up the backside never did me any harm when I was a child, now has anyone seen my AK-47?
As far as I can make out, this isn't recent research. A quick google brings up a piece in The Guardian from 2000 with subsequent similar reports since, that Nursery staff aren't allowed to call children naughty.
That probably accounts for all the early 20 somethings and younger, who are little s***s.
If a child does something naughty once and is told they are naughty just once, they have no inherent understanding of being constantly being naughty. If a child continues to be naughty, guess what, they're naughty.
Stop making excuses for them, grow some balls and deal with it and stop pampering the little s***s.
In situations like this, I understand and agree with what you are saying, but to use it as a generalisation when bringing up all children? I'm not so sure, but I'm not the expert.Folks - have a look in to Childhood Trauma. I'm intending to adopt - my child or children will be traumatised having been abused. Most kids will be fine if they're called naughty once in a while - but over time and if coupled with emotional or physical abuse it gets internalised.
Terribly sorry if Gen X / Baby Boomers are offended by objective research - but I fully intend to parent with a view to developing my children, not (potentially) adding to their trauma.
So where is the cut off? Once OK? Twice? Twice a day? It's probably a bit like booze - one or two won't kill you, but won't do you any good either. And yes - I do drink...In situations like this, I understand and agree with what you are saying, but to use it as a generalisation when bringing up all children? I'm not so sure, but I'm not the expert.
As often as necessary. If they are naughty, tell them, if they are good let them know.So where is the cut off? Once OK? Twice? Twice a day? It's probably a bit like booze - one or two won't kill you, but won't do you any good either. And yes - I do drink...
When my eldest neice was 18, we all went out for a family meal at a local Harvester before she went out with her mates. My two youngest nephews were running amok and messing about with the cutlery on empty tables and near other people trying to enjoy their own meals. My sister in law was getting more and more stressed trying to control them and look after her 1yr old daughter at the same time. Her husband did nothing apart from keep saying how he was having a wonderful time.I think a lot of the problem relates to parenting skills, or lack of them. I cannot remember the last time I witnessed a parent, in public, chastise one of their offspring for running amok. Parent probably staring at their mobile phone and far too busy to be parenting.
If children are not corrected on bad behaviour, how are they to learn right from wrong? Too many parents seem to want to shift the responsibility onto teachers and anyone else they can.
If a child is ‘naughty’ then they should be told, not ‘oh look, Jonny is self-expressing’. It is not labelling, it is called parenting and taking responsibility!
Tw@tLike every human being on the planet I do some idiotic things. I don't mind, sometimes after a period of reflection, being told I've done something idiotic.
But no one had better call me an idiot.
This very forum is run on similar principles.