Joke!!!

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Julie
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#1
Hey guys it's been a while since anyone has posted up any jokes. I saw this one in another forum and wanted to share this with you all. I think it's funny, but we'll see.


One day a man and his wife were puttering around the garden. The man leaned over to his wife who was bent over and said, "Honey your butt is getting really big", I mean really big. I bet it's bigger than our Bar-B-cue. He proceeded to get the measuring tape out and measured his wifes butt and than he measured the bar-b-cue. "Yep he said your butt is exactly two inches wider than the barbie.

That night the couple is laying in bed and the husband is feeling very friskie.He makes advances towards his wife who shows absolutely no interest at all.

"What's wrong"? he says

The wife looks at him and says, "Do you honestly think I am going to fire up this big a** grill for one little weenie?
 
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One day God calls down to Noah and says "Noah, I want you to build me a new Ark"

Noha replies " No problem God, I am your humble servant"

God "But Noah, this time I dont want just a couple of decks, I want 20 decks, one on top of the other"

"20 DECKS" screams Noha, and should I fill them up with all the animals, just like last time.

"Yes, sort of" says God, this time I want you to fill it with fish

"FISH" asks Noah

"Yes", says God, to be specific, carp.

"So you want me to build a new Ark, with 20 decks, and fill it from floor to ceiling with carp, is that correct"asks Noha.

"Yes replies God"

"Why" asks the perpexed Noha"

Because I want you to...............

























...........Build me a MULTI-STOREY CARP ARK.

/dad joke mode is ON :nut:
 
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#5
David Hasselhoff calls his agent and demands, "I want everyone to call me The Hoff from now one." His agent replies "Sure! No hassle."

hmmm...

/enough already!
 
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Steve

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#6
milou said:
David Hasselhoff calls his agent and demands, "I want everyone to call me The Hoff from now one." His agent replies "Sure! No hassle."

hmmm...

/enough already!
:nunu: :annoyed:
 

Marcel

Kim Jong Bod
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#8
lol May I get your coat sir?

Here's one.

Two dyslexics driving down the road, and one says to the other..

"Can you smell petrol"

To which the other replies..

"Smell it? I can't even smell my own name".

hehe


Apoligies to any dyslexics, but in my defense, my wife is dyslexic and found it funny :D
 
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Steve

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#9
Bod said:
Apoligies to any dyslexics, but in my defense, my wife is dyslexic and found it funny :D

Lol at the joke and which did you find funny, the wife or the joke? :whistling
 

Marcel

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#10
I'm keeping schtum, it's for my own good. I leant that one ages ago. ;)
 
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