Swim/Bike/Run

J

johnl69

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John
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Hi all, I'm really struggling with this composition image I've done,not sure if its the composition or if the shadowsthat are putting me off. please be as brutally honest with CC as possible.

Studio Session-106.jpg
 
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Good idea and very well executed! (y)(y)
I would suggest, given the dynamic
of the photo-composition to retrieve
some shadows so to brighten it a tad.
 
The only thing bothering me Is
the swimmers head up the cyclists back end . I think it would balance better if the swimmer and runner swapped places
 
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Its the location of the swimmer that doesn't quite work for me either although understand why they are in that order. Oh and shoes on the swimmer!
 
Most has been mentioned above but one thing that struck me is the scale.
The swimmer is smaller, perhaps if at the same scale, the swimmers dive position would arch over the cyclists back giving a little seperation?
 
I agree, it's the swimmer that is problematic, for me her arms and head are in an awkward place with respect to the cyclist although I struggle to suggest a way to improve on what you have and keep the same order.
 
I think if the swimmers dive were facing the camera, it would give a constant rotation to the subjects directions and improve the composition problem. Going from Across the frame to coming out of the picture and back to across the frame is quite jarring.
 
I'm going to agree with @juggler here. My initial thought was that the image is way too crowded. I'm not sure if using a bit of depth (scaling the individuals front to back) would work - and held off saying anything - but when I read the triptych suggestion - that was the solution (for me!)
 
keef32 said:
Think its meant to be in Triathlon order...
Click to expand...

Yes its in Triathlon order.

Giles2373 said:
Its the location of the swimmer that doesn't quite work for me either although understand why they are in that order. Oh and shoes on the swimmer!
Click to expand...

Never noticed she put her shoes on.

Orangecroc said:
I think if the swimmers dive were facing the camera, it would give a constant rotation to the subjects directions and improve the composition problem. Going from Across the frame to coming out of the picture and back to across the frame is quite jarring.
Click to expand...

I have limited space in my studio to move around but I agree if they where all at the same angle it would be better.
this is the space I have.
20901662_10155740625901812_3108097770952415093_o.jpg


Thanks everyone for your comments I'll have to revisit this shoot at some point and make some adjustments.
 
Put the swimmer on a flat table and photograph, remove the table in PS. Then place that image across at the top and two images below. So you have a triangle composition, Swim(top) Bike(bottom left) Run(Bottom Right)
Just an idea.
 
stumac said:
The only thing bothering me Is
the swimmers head up the cyclists back end . I think it would balance better if the swimmer and runner swapped places
Click to expand...

agreed, it just feels a bit human centipede to me, apologies to John as thats an awful comparison to make its just how it feels to me.
I think in terms of having them all moving in the same direction that would be better, the angle the bike is on works for me so i would possibly have all three going that way, swim wise i would say make it more like a front crawl using the table idea from steely, during the crawl you wouldn't normally have both arms forwards at once and in having one arm back it should also elongate the body a little too which in theory should be quite flattering. I am far from an expert on studio work (about as far as it is possible to be tbf) but i just think it doesn't quite feel right. I also had the same thought as steely regarding the triangle idea but i'm not sure you are aiming for that as that seems more like a sports logo to me than an athlete photo shoot
 
juggler said:
I think it would look better as 3 separate images presented as a triptych.
Click to expand...

Completely agree. The only other thing that bothers me (and its only slight) is the runners right shoe. It seems odd to completely vanish behind the wheel of the bike. Might just be me.
 
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