not keen on the edited one sorry, (prefer the original) but has gary said would look very nice at sunrise/set you have the right location just get it at the right time and you'd have a beautiful picture.
First: the horizon is wonky :nono:
second: (and more subjective) perhaps slightly too close-cropped from top and/or bottom. I'd prefer it less panoramic, if you know what I mean?
Not bad for a first shot. Composition's ok but as has already been pointed out the poor light let your image down. Go back as Gary suggested at sunrise or sunset or on a sunnier day and you'll have a great shot. The edited version with the artificial filter doesn't work for me.
Nice try for a 1st photo, a little editing and you could improve it. With more practise you'll be able to get it right in camera too.
Here's a quick edit to the levels in your photo, not brilliant because of the small file size that you've uploaded.
And before the horizon police mention it...no I haven't straightened them ;
And one that's cropped and added a warming filter;
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