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Lightning struck an Agnostic in Bristol, Virginia. He was getting out of his car, near the intersection of Euclid and Forster Avenue, and the bolt flashed from above and blew the clothes right off Johnny Benson's back. It took all of a few milliseconds, leaving the shape of a cross in his right buttocks.He was taken to the Mankinko Emergency Clinic of Lowell Hospital, where all he could recall of the loud clap of thunder and an ominous voice from above that said, "Go to church!"
He sweats a lot. Left alone he shaved his head. He has chronic meekness.
Contrary to popular opinion atheists are popular in the Bible Belt.
"We love atheists in the bible belt", says Luke Browning. "We hunt them for their fur. Keeps us warm in the winter. Grandma Reynolds needs just six more pelts before you can get a full-lenght coat. If you see a big hairy beast, please point him out."