Friday joke Time

[Jonnyreb]

Morris and his wife Ethel went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, "Ethel, I'd like to ride in that helicopter". Ethel always replied, "I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars – and fifty dollars is fifty dollars".


One year Ethel and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, "Ethel, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance." Ethel replied, "Morris that helicopter is fifty dollars -- and fifty dollars is fifty dollars".

The pilot overheard the couple and said, "Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word I won't charge you! But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars." Morris and Ethel agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy manoeuvres, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, "By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!"

Morris replied, "Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Ethel fell out, but you know - fifty dollars is fifty dollars."

 

[Puz]

groan....

 

[Jonnyreb]

:d

 

[spannerdude]

That's bad. This is worse..

A very successful lawyer parked his brand new Porsche Carrera GT in front
of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck
came along too close to the curb and completely tore off the driver's door.

Fortunately, a cop in a police car was close enough to see the accident and
pulled up behind the Porsche, his lights flashing. But, before the cop had
a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically
about how his Porsche, which he had just picked up the day before, was now
completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter how hard the body
shop tries to make it new again.

After the lawyer finally wound down from his rant, the cop shook his head
in disgust and disbelief. "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are,"
he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most
important things in life."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It
got ripped off when the truck hit you!!!"
"OH, MY GOD!" screamed the lawyer.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>


"MY ROLEX!"

 

[zeroeseight]

 

[oldgit]

doh