Your favourite phrases...

That child is so ugly his mother feeds him with a catapult.
 
For me:

"Man your one crazy cat"

and "does the pop **** in the woods"
 
mine is
"i'd love to see it from your point of view, but i dont think i could get my head that far up my own arse"

:p
 
"Who was that did that song you are humming?" "Ahh yes. Let's keep it that way"

I do have more but for some reason I'm having an epic memory fail and can't think of any more :/
 
People like you, who think they know everything, often annoy people like me, who do.
 
I was speaking to someone a couple of weeks ago about the Ranchman's party I'm going to tonight. He said:

You'll see more arse than a toilet seat there!
Click to expand...
 
talking to a lady driver while delivering at boots manufacturing in notts today.
she came out with.
"oooh, i would rather shag a midget, than spend another minute here".
she was bigger than me.
and i,m 15 stone plus , and 5'10''.
put an image in my head that made me laugh out loud for quite some time.
 
"It went down like a cup of cold sick"

"As much use as one-legged man in an @rse-kicking contest"

"With legs like that I'd walk on me hands!"
 
An old one but none the less I still like it.

Boy chatting up Girl and hoping for a night of passion:

'How do you take your eggs baby, fried or boiled?'

Answer:

'Unfertilised, now pxxs off'

Chris
 
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