Recent content by Cordy

June PBs Me £200 Mrs C £25

I came home really drunk last night and my wife wasn’t happy at all. “How much have you had to drink?” she asked sternly, staring at me. “Nothing” I slurred. “Look at me!” she shouted. “It’s either me or the pub, which one is it?” I paused for a second while I thought and mumbled... “It’s...

I have been asked to wear a 'Vote Labour' T-shirt for 2 weeks as part of a social experiment to see how people react. So far I have been spat on, punched and had a bottle thrown at me. I’m curious to see what’s going to happen when I leave the house !

My girlfriend just dumped me. She said in a teary tirade: “I can’t take your sh1t any more. You’re so pedantic. Everything I do is wrong. I loved you so much, but it’ll never be enough for you. I’m leaving now. Me and Gary are driving up north through the night and then you’ll never hear from...

STOP PRESS The government have pleaded with the public not to pack out the beaches this bank holiday. There are concerns that immigrant boats will have nowhere to land.

May Premium Bond draw: Mrs C £75 Me £25 :mad: :headbang:

...: When you put his head in a plastic bag, he suffocated..... ...groan...

@wilt Hi, I have the 50mm 1.8 lens. How did you 'tone it down for portraits'

NASA are facing criticism over their successful Artemis II mission after it was revealed that the cost of the 9 day voyage was approximately £4 billion. Some experts have pointed out that for the same money they could have stayed at Center Parcs for two weeks instead!

Likewise Avanti.

PBs April, Me £225 Mrs C £225

Three aspiring psychiatrists Eric, Peter and Murphy were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters," said the professor "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said Eric. "And the opposite of depression?" "Elation," said Peter. "And you sir," he...

March Premium Bonds Me £0 -- sad face Mrs C £375

Feb Premium Bond draw Mrs C £275 Me £00

Made a cake today for the village hall fete. The lady judge said, " Your cherries have dropped " I said," So have your tits, but I'm not complaining" I'll just make something out of wood next year.