A lady took pictures of my son...

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3,407
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Chris
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#1
A positive story for a change.

Me, the wife and our two year old son were on a boat in Norway last weekend, a cruise ship was in port so there were loads of Americans in town.

Our Fjord boat trip was fairly busy but we were the only people to take a kid onboard. As always our son drew plenty of positive attention. Towards the end of the trip our son was asleep so we were just having a rest next to him. A 60ish year old American lady approaches us and tells us what a beautiful family we have and could she have our email address to send us some pictures.

We forgot about this, but this morning we received a really touching email from a 'grandma missing her grandkids' which went on to say how much she just enjoyed watching us with him on the boat, attached were a few pictures she captured of us with him (we were totally oblivious at the time).

I thought this was interesting for a few reasons:

1) Until I told this story to a friend today neither my wife or I thought, discussed or even considered the negative connotations of this or how some parents may have reacted.

2) The complete innocence of the lady taking the pictures. Maybe she's from a quiet town or just from another time where it never even occurred to her that we could have taken it very badly.

3) Having had that conversation today, it made me a little sad that I've seen/see so many lovely moments whilst out and about with my camera that I would love to have captured for the parents, but sadly society doesn't really allow that, particularly as a 30 something male.

Bergen was stunning by the way, it comes highly highly recommended as a 'city break', even with a two year old!

Bergen by -Harry_S-
 
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#2
Excellent, like yourself I have often been sitting down somewhere and seeing parents/kids play (often with my own kids) - notably usually in the park or wherever, and not a camera in site. It would be nice to capture those moments, frame them or keep them. As we all know, you cant just take photos of kids - I always deem it fit to ask first but unfortunately it becomes non-candid and the shots don't seem as good.
 
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Stuart
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#3
Sadly us good uns are all painted with the same brush as those who take photos for more sinister reasons and sadly that is why society is the way it is now.

Notwithstanding that though your story is quite touching!
 
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Melvyn
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#4
I did a similar shot of a child and his mother in Norfolk a couple of weeks ago. Got an email address sent it off to her. Received a thank you email back. Thanking me. May be its the way people approch the subject that counts.
 
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Stuart
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#6
I think it's maybe more a case of who is in the photo. Perhaps supervising adults aren't objectionable to having their child(ren) photographed if they are in the photo as well. The same people might only think it sinister if a tog photographs their child on his or her own.
 
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#7
I take photos of strangers quite often and give them a card or an email address or take theirs. The approach, I have found, is everything. I've had some lovely feedback from people; makes my day and they seem happy too.
 
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#8
As we all know, you cant just take photos of kids.
Well, you can, especially in public, but yes it does depend on the circumstances.

I often do it, but then I have some business cards pointing at my website with my email address on. I usually approach the family afterwards "I think I've a possible great image of your child, look. Would you like a copy" and hand over the business card.
 
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#9
Well, you can, especially in public, but yes it does depend on the circumstances.

I often do it, but then I have some business cards pointing at my website with my email address on. I usually approach the family afterwards "I think I've a possible great image of your child, look. Would you like a copy" and hand over the business card.
Thats not a bad idea, I usually have a notepad and pen and take any contact details if I catch any child shots and want the parents to have them, usually email address. I think business cards is a better idea. I might do just that.

Thanks
 
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#10
I was up Tower Bridge with my family a few weeks ago, when a young Asian guy started taking photos of my 3yo (I could see on his camera's screen)... and actually getting in my way.

"That's enough now," I said, and he just looked at me. "I'm his dad," I added.

"He's cute!" the guy replied, kinda missing the point.
 
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Geof
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#11
When I was in Malta in the quiet streets of M'Dina there were quite a few really good candids of children which I greedily took
When I reviewed them I got a bit of a chilly feeling and deleted them all....glad I did,
Cheers
Geof
 
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#13
I have one of those little polaroid pogo printers I used to take with me when abroad (actually I now have 3 or 4, all with duff batteries). Kids love having their photos taken and love having a copy. Then you couldn't keep them away
 
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Geof
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#14
How odd. Why did you delete them. (Obviously your choice. )
I felt I was stealing... For my own uses
I have my own grandchildren and great grandchildren to capture for posterity.
Having said that I do have some shots from the past of children from foreign travel I have shown on the forum and will again.
None however from Bergen .:) but I do have that view.
 
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Richard
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#15
I was up Tower Bridge with my family a few weeks ago, when a young Asian guy started taking photos of my 3yo (I could see on his camera's screen)... and actually getting in my way.

"That's enough now," I said, and he just looked at me. "I'm his dad," I added.

"He's cute!" the guy replied, kinda missing the point.
And what was the point he missed?
 
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Richard
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#17
Regardless of what s/he looks like, it's f**king rude sneaking multiple photos of a young kid out with his family.
But that is what street photography is all about, one of the most popular genres - unless you're making a particular point about young kids. And it sounds like he was actually paying you a compliment ;)

FWIW, I think it's rude and intrusive too and I don't like doing it (though I have done, as necessary for work) but it's 100% legal in public places, and long may it remain so.
 
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Geof
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#19
But that is what street photography is all about, one of the most popular genres - unless you're making a particular point about young kids. And it sounds like he was actually paying you a compliment ;)

FWIW, I think it's rude and intrusive too and I don't like doing it (though I have done, as necessary for work) but it's 100% legal in public places, and long may it remain so.
dont f*** around my family, chum

:D

actually my spelling of f*** was wrong as well..didnt you noris
 
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#21
But that is what street photography is all about, one of the most popular genres - unless you're making a particular point about young kids. And it sounds like he was actually paying you a compliment ;)

FWIW, I think it's rude and intrusive too and I don't like doing it (though I have done, as necessary for work) but it's 100% legal in public places, and long may it remain so.
It wasn't a public place - it was at the top of Tower Bridge.

Yes, it is about him being a kid. He's 3. He's not in a position to decide who does/doesn't take his photo. No-one should 'assume' it's ok.

And, again, the 'compliment' is immaterial.
 
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Geof
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#22
Can't help thinking that a well placed comma between family and chum would make for less awkward reading ;)
:D
no i dont hunt sharks...even though there are a lot around...

comma accepted
 
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Geof
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#23
It wasn't a public place - it was at the top of Tower Bridge.

Yes, it is about him being a kid. He's 3. He's not in a position to decide who does/doesn't take his photo. No-one should 'assume' it's ok.

And, again, the 'compliment' is immaterial.
is the courtesy of asking permission still popular...not easy when you are snapping street stuff...
children are liable to say yes not knowing the implications...
i think the camera is becoming an intrusive part of our society...when society is the subject...within reason
even photographing what seems like innocent situations could infringe on privacy or compromise secrecy...it still exists and is not so noticeable in public places
one oneders if big brother has a canon or nikon...or even a pos...
which this is
cheers
geof
 
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Mike
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#26
I took this in a park in Basingstoke i asked the mum if I could try and get a splash shot she was,nt quite sure what I meant until I got this and she almost started crying saying it was amazing ( I was quite chuffed as it was exactly what I was after) I think the point is always to ask 1st if you have the opportunity. i emailed her a copy she loved it cheers, Mike.

perfect timing
by Mike Rockey, on Flickr
 
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#27
Excellent, like yourself I have often been sitting down somewhere and seeing parents/kids play (often with my own kids) - notably usually in the park or wherever, and not a camera in site. It would be nice to capture those moments, frame them or keep them. As we all know, you cant just take photos of kids - I always deem it fit to ask first but unfortunately it becomes non-candid and the shots don't seem as good.
I dont even take my camera to places where there might be loads of kids, started watching for any other kids in the frame except my own and over a period of time became obsessed with only getting my own children in the shots and obsessed with what other parents might be thinking of me, it became easier to simply take the odd quick snap using my mobile and not a proper camera.
 
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#28
is the courtesy of asking permission still popular...not easy when you are snapping street stuff...
Thing is, I wouldn't have an objection if a photographer caught my kid(s) in a candid pic - on a street, in public.

But I do object when someone specifically targets my son and takes multiple shots... especially when I'm literally 1ft away (with a camera in my own hand) and can easily be consulted.
 
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Geof
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#29
Thing is, I wouldn't have an objection if a photographer caught my kid(s) in a candid pic - on a street, in public.

But I do object when someone specifically targets my son and takes multiple shots... especially when I'm literally 1ft away (with a camera in my own hand) and can easily be consulted.
what would he do with them and how would you know...
..ok if it is a chap here on the phorum etc and he shows them and just by chance you recognise your children
regarding multiple shots...you dont know really how many one fellow may have taken...as he 'targets' your child

its not all done in innocence and i do stress that one should ask or be asked...and then be prepared to answer the question..why? and indeed ask it...if there is a good simple reason..oh i think your child is soooo cute
well thanks...get your own!!

for many years, through my wifes suggestion being a primary school teacher...
DO NOT PHOTOGRAPH THE CHILDREN IN THE PLAYGROUND...THE PARENTS WILL OBJECT
even though we were both in the local camera club and saw others showing children shots
best left alone
lots more adults to photograph...and dont forget to carry your model release forms..
:D
cheers
geof
 
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Geof
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#31
Personally I think we sometimes shoot ourselves in the foot expecting negative reactions when taking candid pictures. Yes you have to choose your subjects well but not everyone objects ( but then I have been out of the UK for sometime)
we will be watching for you...:snaphappy::snaphappy:
 
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Susanne
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#33
I totally understand having negative feelings about taking photos of kids. It's sad what society has become :(.
I love street photography and in the summer of 2016 I was in Italy and took some photos in Norcia, Umbria. Among them are some kids with their dog around a small water fountain next to the San Benedetto cathedral. I thought it was a very nice photo but I've been uneasy about posting it somewhere because of the kids (I didn't see any parents around so couldn't ask).
A few months later, Norcia was badly damaged in one of the very devastating earthquakes, and the cathedral was destroyed (only the front still stands). Those photos now are invaluable to me personally, they are documentation of what Norcia used to be and what the cathedral used to be. The photos would probably be appreciated by many people as memories of Norcia before the earthquake. Still, I'm not sure I would feel comfortable about posting them on a blog or similar.
 
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Dave
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#34
I thought it was a very nice photo but I've been uneasy about posting it somewhere because of the kids (I didn't see any parents around so couldn't ask).
Wait 40 years then post them. :)
 

TCR4x4

Wishes he had a couple more Inches
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Tom
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#35
I took some some (if I may say so) incredible photos of my young niece and nephew at a local beauty spot. Typical kids, playing in the woods and stream having a great time.
I used the samyang 85 f/ 1.4 with its amazing colours and bokeh.
I was over the moon with them and emailed them to their mother fully expecting her to ask for prints etc..

Well, I was wrong. She told me never to take photos of her kids again without her permission and I was strictly forbidden to ever show them to anyone or upload them anywhere incase they got stolen by a pedophile.

I suggested she never lets her kids leave the house incase someone sees them.

What irked me even more is a few years later, she asked me to take her son out in the woods to take some photos for him for a school competition.
 
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Richard
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#36
I took some some (if I may say so) incredible photos of my young niece and nephew at a local beauty spot. Typical kids, playing in the woods and stream having a great time.
I used the samyang 85 f/ 1.4 with its amazing colours and bokeh.
I was over the moon with them and emailed them to their mother fully expecting her to ask for prints etc..

Well, I was wrong. She told me never to take photos of her kids again without her permission and I was strictly forbidden to ever show them to anyone or upload them anywhere incase they got stolen by a pedophile.

I suggested she never lets her kids leave the house incase someone sees them.

What irked me even more is a few years later, she asked me to take her son out in the woods to take some photos for him for a school competition.
I really struggle to understand this. Kids and adults are being filmed on cctv almost all the time these days.
 
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Toni
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#37
I totally understand having negative feelings about taking photos of kids. It's sad what society has become :(.
I love street photography and in the summer of 2016 I was in Italy and took some photos in Norcia, Umbria. Among them are some kids with their dog around a small water fountain next to the San Benedetto cathedral. I thought it was a very nice photo but I've been uneasy about posting it somewhere because of the kids (I didn't see any parents around so couldn't ask).
A few months later, Norcia was badly damaged in one of the very devastating earthquakes, and the cathedral was destroyed (only the front still stands). Those photos now are invaluable to me personally, they are documentation of what Norcia used to be and what the cathedral used to be. The photos would probably be appreciated by many people as memories of Norcia before the earthquake. Still, I'm not sure I would feel comfortable about posting them on a blog or similar.
That makes me sad Susanne, not least because I've only seen Norcia since the quake, but also that you'd feel unable to show pictures playing in a normal street.
 
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Susanne
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#38
That makes me sad Susanne, not least because I've only seen Norcia since the quake, but also that you'd feel unable to show pictures playing in a normal street.
Oh, now I nearly want to post them so that you can see old Norcia. It was magnificent. That cathedral was absolutely fantastic.
But yes, it's sad. At least I have some other pictures too, without children.
 
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