Cats Vs Dogs

Madpup

Madpup

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EXCERPT FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVOURITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

12:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVOURITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!

5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVOURITE!

6:00 pm - OH BOY! PLAYING BALL! MY FAVOURITE!

6:30 pm - OH BOY! SLEEPING IN MY PEOPLES BED! MY FAVOURITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY

Day 183

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair, must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts.
They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was.
Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
the food.
More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog
is routinely released and seems more than happy to return.
He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly.
I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.

It is only a matter of time.......
 
excellent :first:
 
See now I just know I am going to upset some people here but cats are very, very, very annoying. The thing that really makes me want to strangle everyone I could get my hands on (metaphorically speaking ;) ) is when they decide to walk all over your clean car leaving footprints all the way up your bonnet, across the windscreen and onto your roof. They then sit there looking like they own the thing, leaving a scabby, smelly fur in a ball around the spot that they choose to bask in the sun from, then when you chase the feckers off, they always run down your back window and across the boot to complete the paw print footpath so that you have to clean the whole car again.

For that reason alone I HATE CATS
 
They know this Steve, and that is why they do it.
 
What they sit on your car and leave paw prints over your bonnet, windows and boot? :suspect1:
 
GfK said:
I hate chavs, for the same reason. :)
Click to expand...

Chavs sleep on the roof of your car :shock:

i think you need to try a little :nunu:eek:n them


Cats are by far the best choice of household pet, far smarter than dogs, and much funnier too.
 
Steve said:
What they sit on your car and leave paw prints over your bonnet, windows and boot? :suspect1:
Click to expand...

Even worse when the missus had a Mini Cooper convertible with a blue hood & you see white cat on the roof......clawing !!!!! :shock: . HATE Cats also ;)
 
Cats are cool - dogs are just curry waiting to happen...






And before anyone asks, yes I have eaten a dog or two. In Africa, a long time ago.
It was yummy.
 
Or a Davy Crockett hat... just coz I like them doesn't mean mine don't annoy me...
Car thing does my head in as well - I find that a large hammer on the paws does the trick...
 
i love cats, great animals, dogs are just stoopid, cats KNOW, they know EVERYTHING One of mine waits till im mid wee before having a go at the bannister with the claws, any other time there is a small slap in it for her....
 
My cat seems to just not like the bedroom door open. If she's in the bedroom, and I shut it, she feels hungry. If she's asleep in the living room or something, and I shut it, she wants to go out. Naturally I'm sat in the bedroom next to the window.

And the door's of the type that it naturally falls open if you give it a gentle shove.
 
Dogs eat cats (mine tried to anyway), that puts them as number one for me. :D
 
I think it was Winston Churchill that once said

"I like pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals"
 
See, while a lot of dogs are stupid, not all breeds are..

And the main difference between cats and dogs is emotion - cats just can't show it.. If a dog is sad, they'll let you know...

Cats just seem a little pointless to me.
 
Cats show emotion! Admitedly its distain and contempt but thats still emotion.
 
Our 17 year old Border Collie dog died earlier this year. We had another dog before this one.

Must say I am enjoying being pet free now we have got used to there being no dog around. What I think does not count for much so I doubt we will be pet free permanently (especially as my daughter is doing a Vet. Nursing degree )
 
I'm a dog person, pretty well always had a dog, but like Robert, since our old Springer Ben went to the happy hunting ground, we're enjoying the freedom of not having pets to worry about.

We owned a Siamese cat years ago - the damage it caused scratching and clawing at furniture was horrendous! House training - with a cat you have newspaper and foul smelling trays of cat litter, which Tiddles will probably use when it feels like co-operating, whereas with a dog you just have to have a quite word "Look here old chap, it really isn't on you know, dropping Richard The Thirds all over the carpet" and the job's done.

I wouldn't harm a cat but I don't really warm to them. Cats don't have owners - they have Staff.
 
I love my dog (a female Westie), but do find it a hassle to arrange for someone to look after her every time we go away...
 
CT said:
Cats don't have owners - they have Staff.
Click to expand...
Spot on. The neighbours cat has kindly decapitated another wild rabbit today & left it on our doorstep.......obviously I wasn't getting the hint they wanted me to cook it for them !! Maybe I should teach our Boxer & Miniature Schnauzer to hunt cats ;)

bewareofthedog.gif
 
Madpup said:
EXCERPT FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVOURITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVOURITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

12:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVOURITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVOURITE!

5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVOURITE!

5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVOURITE!

6:00 pm - OH BOY! PLAYING BALL! MY FAVOURITE!

6:30 pm - OH BOY! SLEEPING IN MY PEOPLES BED! MY FAVOURITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY

Day 183

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair, must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts.
They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was.
Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
the food.
More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog
is routinely released and seems more than happy to return.
He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly.
I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.

It is only a matter of time.......
Click to expand...

Youre cat called Stewie by any chance? :p
 
you think you have got it bad...

my cat is 15 years old, has one eye , no teeth , bent tail , raggy ears and falls over when he shakes his head,

he forgets that he has just come in and when out spands all the time trying to get back in through the patio doors, when let in he goes to the back door to go out, spends the rest of the time asleep on the sofa inbetween gumming the spacially bought soft food so we can enjoy his company..........he is older than my children

MyPix


he is just like the old preist in Father Ted........:thumb:
 
Steve said:
The world would be a better place without cats
Click to expand...
Actually I love cats but I thought you would appreciate this pic, feel free to remove it if you think it's in bad taste :laugh1:
 
It's great to see Jack Russels with their tails :)

Mine :D no tail in view.
judysm.jpg
 
I remember way back in the 70's, when I was in the Merchant Navy, tasting dog and cat in Korea.
Surprisingly I prefered cat, a bit like rabbit really.

If you can put it out of your mind that you're eating a cat or dog then it goes down nicely.

I prefer my cat with a Châteauneuf du Pape :thumb:
 
Garnock said:
I remember way back in the 70's, when I was in the Merchant Navy, tasting dog and cat in Korea.
Surprisingly I prefered cat, a bit like rabbit really.
Click to expand...

I discovered that Human tastes quite similar to pork.

Well at least this human does.... When you are spotwelding metal panels together sometimes the unexpected happens and there is no circuit made between the electrodes. Where you are holding the parts with your hand it does make contact - and the weld happens between your fingers and thumb.
Bare hand on red hot metal = instant cooked finger surface. Immediately after swearing and dropping the work your instinct is to suck your sore finger... mmm pork crackling.
 
I personally like cat's as they're more independant, have to say I disagree with anyone who says cat's dont show emotion, my cat always comes up to greet me when i arrive home from work.

as there seem to be lots of pictures of dogs here, here's one of my cat
McTavish.jpg
 
Did you know Pigs are genetically very similar to humans?
 
We have just 1 cat on our farm, My daughter got him for her 8th birthday ten years ago..
He loves it here..:)

sammy.jpg


We also have to keep up with working dogs too as its a must on a farm..

This is Billy who has grown full size since this was taken..

pup-small.jpg
 
three dogs, although it could go to one literally any day, both the yellow labs are on their last legs at just over 14 years old, this was taken a few years ago :( Also got a couple of cats.

dogs.jpg
 
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