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- The real Chris
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Well its Friday again the week-end starts here 
2 days later and we will be back at work
But in the mean time have a couple of grins on me
There are only eleven times in history where the "F" word has been considered acceptable for use.
( but not really PC )
They are as follows:
11. "What the f'k do you mean, we are sinking?" --
Capt. E.J. Smith of RMS Titanic, 1912
10. "What the f'kin'ell was that bang?" --
Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945
9. "cor look at all those f'kin Indians!"
-- Custer, 1877
8. "Any f'kin idiot could understand that." --
Einstein, 1938
7. " of course it f'kin looks like her!" --
Picasso, 1926
6. "How the f'k did you work that out?" --
Pythagoras, 126 BC
5. "You want WHAT on the f'kin ceiling?" --
Michelangelo, 1566
4. "Where the f'k are we?" --
Amelia Earhart, 1937
3. "Scattered f'kin showers, my ass!" --
Noah, 4314 BC
2. "Aw c'mon. Who the f'k is going to find out?" --
Bill Clinton, 1998
1. "Geez, I didn't think they'd get that f'kin mad." ---
Adolf Hitler 1945
....................................................................................
A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes
off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks
by, and the man immediately gets an erection.
The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Did you call
for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new
here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it
implies you called for me." Smiling, she leads him to the side of the
swimming pool. She lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and
happily lets him have his way with her.
Later, the man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters
the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.
Within minutes a huge, hairy
man lumbers out of the room toward him, "Did you call for me?" asks the
hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new," says the hairy man,
"it's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you
called for me." The huge man then easily spins him around, bends him over a
bench and has his way with him.
The newcomer then staggers back to the colony office, where he is
greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says.
The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee."
"But, Sir," she says, "you've only been
here for a few hours! You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities!"
The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 68 years old. I only get an erection once
a month and I fart 15 times a day. I'm outta here!"
2 days later and we will be back at work But in the mean time have a couple of grins on me
There are only eleven times in history where the "F" word has been considered acceptable for use.
( but not really PC )
They are as follows:
11. "What the f'k do you mean, we are sinking?" --
Capt. E.J. Smith of RMS Titanic, 1912
10. "What the f'kin'ell was that bang?" --
Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945
9. "cor look at all those f'kin Indians!"
-- Custer, 1877
8. "Any f'kin idiot could understand that." --
Einstein, 1938
7. " of course it f'kin looks like her!" --
Picasso, 1926
6. "How the f'k did you work that out?" --
Pythagoras, 126 BC
5. "You want WHAT on the f'kin ceiling?" --
Michelangelo, 1566
4. "Where the f'k are we?" --
Amelia Earhart, 1937
3. "Scattered f'kin showers, my ass!" --
Noah, 4314 BC
2. "Aw c'mon. Who the f'k is going to find out?" --
Bill Clinton, 1998
1. "Geez, I didn't think they'd get that f'kin mad." ---
Adolf Hitler 1945
....................................................................................
A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes
off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks
by, and the man immediately gets an erection.
The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Did you call
for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new
here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it
implies you called for me." Smiling, she leads him to the side of the
swimming pool. She lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and
happily lets him have his way with her.
Later, the man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters
the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.
Within minutes a huge, hairy
man lumbers out of the room toward him, "Did you call for me?" asks the
hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new," says the hairy man,
"it's a rule that if you fart, it implies that you
called for me." The huge man then easily spins him around, bends him over a
bench and has his way with him.
The newcomer then staggers back to the colony office, where he is
greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says.
The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee."
"But, Sir," she says, "you've only been
here for a few hours! You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities!"
The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 68 years old. I only get an erection once
a month and I fart 15 times a day. I'm outta here!"
