As well as being a photography god....(new miracle added!)

Not in Norfolk, we can do pretty much whatever we like around here.....and besides which, if the police did turn up, they'd be too busy admiring the incredible quality of my parking to write me a ticket!! ;)

We're quite lucky here in Poland, as long as there's 1.5m left for pedistrians you can park on sidwalks :D

Still, I must say, having the tires (tyres) sticking out like that on the curb (kurb). Tut tut ;)
 
I could do that easily. I'm actually known as being 'the best parker ever'. Due to my SKILL'Z.
 
Damien,

I bow down to your greater parking skills than any other human alive today, as so clearly evidenced by your picture.

Maybe you could do courses for mere mortals to improve their skills.

The owner of this Fiat Brava would be the first contender.......(Taken on iphone at Harford Bridges Tesco's a while back - purely as I couldn't belive such amazing parking skills!) :LOL:

tescoparking.jpg


and a 100% crop (yeah was a 2Mp 3G so don't expect miracles) - just to prove the car was parked (empty / unattended)

parking100crop.jpg
 
Well today was the day of the TP Banham Zoo meet, and after I'd shown the whole group my incredible god like photography skills, I thought I'd show off a little and nail another miraculous parking maneuver.....

Can't say it was easy, but I was never in any doubt that I'd be able to pull it off!

It doesn't happen often, but I have to say I even impressed myself this time!!

22052010042a.jpg


Big :clap: for me!! (y)
 
totally awesome........

how many point and shunts....

I would guess for a parking god like yourself no more than 5....... :notworthy::notworthy::notworthy:


I think you really need to spread your parking god skills........ esp with the dosy bat in Tescos (see post 43)
 
totally awesome........

Yeah......I KNOW!!!!!

how many point and shunts....

I would guess for a parking god like yourself no more than 5....... :notworthy::notworthy::notworthy:

5????!!!! :eek: Pfft....3, and not a single bumper touch! :nono:

I think you really need to spread your parking god skills........

I'm thinking of getting a superhero outfit made.....I'm currently deciding what colour underpants to wear over my lime green lycra leggings.....:thinking:
 
At least you haven't parked on the pavement this time Damien :LOL:
 
I'm currently deciding what colour underpants to wear over my lime green lycra leggings...

Has to be pink............ just has to be.....
 
I thought that too, how do people with buggies, prams, wheelchairs etc get by you parked like that.:thumbsdown:

EPIC FAIL!!!

They go past the car on the pavement, where if you'd read the thread properly, you'd already know there was plenty of room??!

Always amazes me how quickly people find fault in an otherwise nice gesture.....I thought I'd try and put a smile on a few peoples faces and maybe make one or two people laugh :shrug: by poking fun at myself and inviting others to do the same.....you know, share some happiness??!!

It must be incredible to go through life never breaking a rule, or a law like doing 41mph on a 40mph road, or buying alcohol when your 17 years 11 months and 25 days old, or running down a school corridor when your only supposed to walk, or borrowing a CD off a friend without seeking the copyright owners permission or god forbid you do something completely unforgivable like clip a blade of grass in a park with your shoe when there's a "No walking on the grass" sign near-by.....me being a manaic genocidal nazi rapist responsible for the death of millions of innocent jews who parks on a pavement for 5 minutes and blocks no-one from doing anything, I can only dream of living such a pure and innocent life.....

I must say, life gets tough for me sometimes, knowing I'll be going straight to hell.....I've even tried to balance the karma side things out a little by dedicating my professional career to safeguarding vunerable children for a crap wage, long hours and bugger all thanks from anyone, and doing voluntary things like spending 8 out of the last 9 xmas day mornings in homeless shelters holding back tears (of laughter obviously) for 4 hours at a time because what I see there in front of me sucks massive balls.....

Yet despite all this (and plenty more) good karma I try and give out to others as often as I can, because I'm a manaic genocidal nazi rapist, I'll go to straight to hell for parking my car in the wrong place, seems a little unfair, but I have to face up to the fact that I'm not perfect, and anyone short of being perfect, just doesn't deserve to live on this earth :shake:

Anyway, I'll bid you all goodbye....no sense in putting off the inevitable, I'm going out now to throw myself under a train.....I simply refuse to inflict my thoughtless and frankly shocking self on humanity any longer, it's been nice knowing you all..... (y)

Nothing like sharing a smile eh?.....:thumbsdown: to you too!
 
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EPIC FAIL!!!

They go past the car on the pavement, where if you'd read the thread properly, you'd already know there was plenty of room??!

Always amazes me how quickly people find fault in an otherwise nice gesture.....I thought I'd try and put a smile on a few peoples faces and maybe make one or two people laugh :shrug: by poking fun at myself and inviting others to do the same.....you know, share some happiness??!!

It must be incredible to go through life never breaking a rule, or a law like doing 41mph on a 40mph road, or buying alcohol when your 17 years 11 months and 25 days old, or running down a school corridor when your only supposed to walk, or borrowing a CD off a friend without seeking the copyright owners permission or god forbid you do something completely unforgivable like clip a blade of grass in a park with your shoe when there's a "No walking on the grass" sign near-by.....me being a manaic genocidal nazi rapist responsible for the death of millions of innocent jews who parks on a pavement for 5 minutes and blocks no-one from doing anything, I can only dream of living such a pure and innocent life.....

I must say, life gets tough for me sometimes, knowing I'll be going straight to hell.....I've even tried to balance the karma side things out a little by dedicating my professional career to safeguarding vunerable children for a crap wage, long hours and bugger all thanks from anyone, and doing voluntary things like spending 8 out of the last 9 xmas day mornings in homeless shelters holding back tears (of laughter obviously) for 4 hours at a time because what I see there in front of me sucks massive balls.....

Yet despite all this (and plenty more) good karma I try and give out to others as often as I can, because I'm a manaic genocidal nazi rapist, I'll go to straight to hell for parking my car in the wrong place, seems a little unfair, but I have to face up to the fact that I'm not perfect, and anyone short of being perfect, just doesn't deserve to live on this earth :shake:

Anyway, I'll bid you all goodbye....no sense in putting off the inevitable, I'm going out now to throw myself under a train.....I simply refuse to inflict my thoughtless and frankly shocking self on humanity any longer, it's been nice knowing you all..... (y)

Nothing like sharing a smile eh?.....:thumbsdown: to you too!

What on earth are you ranting like that for, take it or leave it cars don't belong parked on pavements.
 
What on earth are you ranting like that for, take it or leave it cars don't belong parked on pavements.

Not really ranting, just placing a cherry on top of a very nice day that I had yesterday.....and hopefully raising a few more chuckles by doing so!! (y)

This obviously went woooosh straight over your head, because as we already know by your "What about the wheelchairs etc" comment earlier, you're a black hole when it comes to fun.....:shake:

You and the rest of the "Halo Wearing Angels" can get stuffed, only non perfect losers like myself are allowed in here from now on.....:bat:

now that truly is something special.... (y)

(y) Told you I was good.....;)
 
Not really ranting, just placing a cherry on top of a very nice day that I had yesterday.....and hopefully raising a few more chuckles by doing so!! (y)

This obviously went woooosh straight over your head, because as we already know by your "What about the wheelchairs etc" comment earlier, you're a black hole when it comes to fun.....:shake:

You and the rest of the "Halo Wearing Angels" can get stuffed, only non perfect losers like myself are allowed in here from now on.....:bat:



(y) Told you I was good.....;)

Seems I trampled on your ego, more than once, sorry about that.

Oh here is parking tutorial for you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=REpXf0cmJ64&feature=related

Now that's parking..........owned :LOL:

Have a nice day parking.
 
I know your game :p

[YOUTUBE]<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/SGYFk-S8bcU&hl=en_GB&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/SGYFk-S8bcU&hl=en_GB&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>[/YOUTUBE]
 
Yeah, but who do you think taught him how to do it??!! :thinking: I'll give you a subtle clue.....



ME!!!​



Here's how I started out many years ago, before I became godlike.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MF8RGgIDic4&NR=1

:LOL:

Lolz @ the video but at least he stayed off the pavement.
I have parking sensors on my car, (Landrover) a tow hitch at the rear and solid steel front bumper so parking is never been a problem either.

Enough banter on this life is to short to quander over parking, just don't park on the pavement in future. :wave:
 
I think you're on the wrong forum. Try this one. ;)

www.talkparking.com

I'd get booted off that in minutes....


Actually, I can't.....I 100% genuinely honestly can't :shrug: Lynton will tell you how bad I am at cloning etc....and I often reveal/moan about my PP skills in my 52 thread.....


Well why are you spending your time posting in this thread then :wacky: and I mean seriously :wacky:
 
Norwich huh,... my brother is taking his driving lessons (at 28!). Wanna pop over there and park like that in front his house for me? Just make sure you block his front door while maintaining a minimum of 1/8 of an inch distance from his rear bumper? Could do with some photographic evidence too.
 
Lester,

I can confirm that Damien has the photoshopping skills of a blind dyslexic retarded Walrus.

Many times I have tried to teach him, but he suffers from ADHD as well....

"So Damien, this is how you clone something..."
"Ok Mate, so you select the clone tool, and ........wow look at that plane!"
"Yes, but look, clone, find the area you want to clone from , Alt and click, "
"Ok, alt and click, can I have a drink? wow look at that on the TV. Have you got any Monster Munch?"

:LOL::LOL::LOL:

Parking though, he's your guy!
 
I say you parked your car there and the VW and the Saab moved in afterwards to create the illusion of you doing a somewhat impossible park :p

Erm.....err.....I.....erm......yeah, well, whatever Trevor!!! :razz

Looks like content aware fill in CS5 to me:)

I'm way too poor for CS5 :shake:, I still use Elements 7!!! :eek:
 
Earlier in the year I managed to get my Harley jammed on the steps out of the yard without any help from anyone.

IMG_0139-600x800.jpg


A couple of hours later it was gently suggested to me by a couple of knackered and sweaty mates that I don't attempt this sort of thing again! :nono:

I actually thought it was quite clever and character-building, so I appreciate the hurt that you're feeling when someone pooh-pooh's your efforts! (y):LOL:
 
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