The Official TP Funnies thread ( Joke's Meme's etc )

Cobra

Just not grey enough
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Phitt, Hissy Phitt
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#1
A brand new thread to post your jokes & meme's.

I'll start with an old "classic"

a blind man enters a ladies bar by mistake. he finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. after sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

the bar immediately goes silent. in a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says "before you tell that joke, i think its fair, giving that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. the bartender is a blonde girl.
2. the bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. i'm a 6 foot tall, 15 stone blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. the woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weight lifter.
5. the lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
now think about it seriously, mister. do you still wanna tell that joke?"

the blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares "nah, not if i'm gonna have to explain it five times!"
 
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Bat-Frog
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#5
2015 Donald Trump running for President? Don’t be ridiculous.

2016 Trump will never win.

2017 President Trump can’t do that, can he?

2018 Are you watching the Hunger Games tonight? I hope my District wins!

2019 Did you barricade all the windows? Don’t forget tonight is The Purge.
 
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Jeff
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#6
O.M.G what have i done !!!!!!! :cobra::runaway::runaway::runaway::runaway:
 

Steep

Nutcrack Rapids
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Hugh
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#13
Har har har :D
 

Steep

Nutcrack Rapids
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Hugh
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#18
I dunno, viagra and a paper bag..
 

Steep

Nutcrack Rapids
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Hugh
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#20
A corset a full body stocking some viagra and a good book?
 

Nod

Kronus
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Nod (NOT Ethel!!!)
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#25

Nod

Kronus
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Nod (NOT Ethel!!!)
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#27
:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:D:p:p:p
 
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