The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

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Cobra

Cobra

Just not pink enough
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Phitt, Hissy Phitt
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It's not stopped raining for about three days here now, the local river is almost bursting its banks and I'm seriously thinking of checking the Old Testament for ark building tips! :runaway:
Don't forget the Dinosaurs or unicorns this time (y)
 

Gremlin

*looks down* Yep, I'm a girl!
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Ingrid
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A man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he arrived home, the cat was walking up the driveway.

The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!

He kept taking the cat further and further, and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there.

Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen, is the cat there?”
“Yes”, the wife answers, “why do you ask?”
Frustrated, the man answered, “Put him on the phone, I’m lost and need direction! "
 
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Cobra

Cobra

Just not pink enough
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86,566
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Phitt, Hissy Phitt
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Posted this on my facebook and got accused of being sexist. :ROFLMAO::muted: :schtum:
Someone I know posted something similar, but it revolved around a washing machine. It was removed for not conforming to
Face-books moral standards..
:rolleyes:
 
OP
OP
Cobra

Cobra

Just not pink enough
Staff member
Messages
86,566
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Phitt, Hissy Phitt
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Two guys in their mid-twenties are sitting at a bar having a beer. One of the guys says to his buddy, “Man, you really look tired.”

His buddy says, “Dude, I'm exhausted. My girlfriend wants sex all the time, three, four, even six times a night, every night.
She wakes me up at all hours. I just don't know what to do.”

A fellow about 70, sitting a couple of stools down overheard the conversation.

He looked over at the two young men and with the wisdom of years says...


“Marry her. That'll put a stop to that nonsense
 
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Graham
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Gas.jpg Ton of women.jpg
 
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