An Apology

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I didn't see the need for an apology tbh, people just over reacting. Its only the internet. :shrug::shrug::shrug:
 
I don't really fully understand the 'it's only the internet' argument. If someone is rude to you, they are rude. You shouldn't let that bother you too much, intenet or no, because if someone's intrinsically not very nice (to which I do not mean the op, I have no idea what thread is being talked about) then that is mostly their issue and not your own.

L
 
Headless Lois said:
I don't really fully understand the 'it's only the internet' argument. If someone is rude to you, they are rude. You shouldn't let that bother you too much, intenet or no, because if someone's intrinsically not very nice (to which I do not mean the op, I have no idea what thread is being talked about) then that is mostly their issue and not your own.

L
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^^^ I agreed Lois :thumbs:

People say a lot of 'wrong' things on web forums with that illogical 'it's only the internet' justification. The only difference is that on here you don't get a punch on the nose. It certainly doesn't make it right or even okay to behave without consideration for others.

If you wouldn't say it to their face, don't say it at all.
 
Headless Lois said:
I don't really fully understand the 'it's only the internet' argument.
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You have to be able to seperate what happens on the internet with what happens in real life.. half the stuff said on here wouldnt be said in real life. This is just a screen with text and pictures on it and you really shouldn't let that upset or annoy you.

In nearly 20 yrs online I have met litrally hundreds of people from forums... General, football, photogrpahy, programming... Every single person I ahve met has been different to the person online.

I may cross swords with a lot of people on here (hehe).. But would be happy to go to a get together and meet them all..

The internet just isnt real life.. it isnt real people.. its a side of those people that only exists online..

Seperate the internet and real life and you will enjoy it more..


BTW all this you? is generalisation to anyone reading and not you lois :)
 
Hmm, I guess because I don't invent an internet persona, I don't expect other people to either. except the nutters.

L
 
You know I think you're both right on the money here. Lois and her camp are right to say that just because it's the internet, it doesn't excuse poor manners and rudeness.

The Kipax camp are also wise to say that when we encounter the rude and thoughtless folks, there is no reason to get upset by the letters floating on the screen in front of you.
 
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KIPAX said:
You have to be able to seperate what happens on the internet with what happens in real life.. half the stuff said on here wouldnt be said in real life. This is just a screen with text and pictures on it and you really shouldn't let that upset or annoy you.

In nearly 20 yrs online I have met litrally hundreds of people from forums... General, football, photogrpahy, programming... Every single person I ahve met has been different to the person online.

I may cross swords with a lot of people on here (hehe).. But would be happy to go to a get together and meet them all..

The internet just isnt real life.. it isnt real people.. its a side of those people that only exists online..

Seperate the internet and real life and you will enjoy it more..


BTW all this you? is generalisation to anyone reading and not you lois :)
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I agree that it is a good idea to develop a thick internet skin, and I'm pleased to say that I've got one, but I don't think it's right that people should find this an essential requirement to survive web debate. But unfortunately, often it is.

However, the main problem lies with the people that post offensive comments rather than those on the receiving end. It is they that are usually most upset, often by losing an argument and losing face.

How can you 'lose face' in a virtual world? Well, clearly you can. The internet isn't virtual at all - it's as real as any other aspect of life and it can provoke emotions just as easily.

The people that cause trouble on web forums are a small number fortunately. The mods know who they are! And really they don't bother me, but I know others do get upset and that just seems completely unnecessary.
 
dazzajl said:
You know I think you're both right on the money here. Lois and her camp are right to say that just because it's the internet, it doesn't excuse poor manners and rudeness.

The Kipax camp are also wise to say that when we encounter the rude and thoughtless folks, there is no reason to get upset by the letters floating on the screen in front of you.
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"Sticks and stones will break my bones, but calling names won't hurt me." That's the same argument. And it's rubbish :D

There is every reason to get upset by letters floating on a screen, just as much as by harsh spoken words and actions. They are personal comments aimed directly at you! The medium is irrelevant, the message is the same.
 
HoppyUK said:
How can you 'lose face' in a virtual world? Well, clearly you can. The internet isn't virtual at all - it's as real as any other aspect of life and it can provoke emotions just as easily.
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I think I pretty much agree with this sentiment

L
 
Headless Lois said:
ooh, no, what did I say? I am not trying to wind anyone up. Or are you sighing at my sad naivety?

L
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You missed the whole point and then you say you havent made up a persona... are we to presume you really havent got a head then ? :) :)
 
HoppyUK said:
There is every reason to get upset by letters floating on a screen.
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Each to his/her own I suppose.. But I would peronally find it hard to take anything anyone says too seriously knowing that in real life it wouldnt happen :)
 
KIPAX said:
You missed the whole point and then you say you havent made up a persona... are we to presume you really havent got a head then ? :) :)
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I understand your point, I really do. I just don't think everyone is the same - some people will be pretty much the same online, real life whatever.
And since when did a name become a persona?

L
 
Headless Lois said:
And since when did a name become a persona?
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when i put two dirty great big smiles next to it :)

and my point was that people dont try to be different online,.. they dont make up a persona to be different... your probably different in real life than my perception of you.. is that because you where trying to be different or because its hard to tell? would you talk to a total stranger like you are to me.. espcialy one who loks as strange and shifty as I do? seriously you act differently online you just dont realise it

the online person is different to the real life..
 
Ah but being different to how you perceive me, doesn't mean I actually AM different. I get the whole seeing a different side to people thing. I don't get the 'this isn't real life' argument though - it's not a license to be more rude, offhand, whatever, just because it's online.
People at book club probably see a different me to people at networking - that's how real life is too

L

eta and you are, of course, right, I didn't understand your point at all.
 
oh the

I think we're just about finished here, Arkady apologised for something he felt warranted it and now we're into a different conversation about nutters on the net. Seems like a good time to let this one go :)
 
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