The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

[Cobra]

thought I;d give you guys an excuse to stare at a boob pic

There are boobs? / goes back for another look ...

 

[Nod]

Four of 'em. Counted them several times to be sure.

 

[camerassassin]

 

[Steep]

 

[Cobra]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

A lady sitting in the dentist chair told the dentist, "I would rather go through the pain of child birth than have you drill in my mouth." The dentist replied, "Well, you had better make up your mind so I can adjust my chair."

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[Cockney]

 

[Cockney]

 

[Cockney]

 

[Cockney]

 

[gm43uk]

The Ballad of Lidl and Aldi

 

[mikew]

 

[mikew]

 

[mikew]

 

[Earley Man]

The Ballad of Lidl and Aldi

Brilliant.

 

[n0chex]

Had a leaflet through my door saying 'Jumble Sale'.

So far I've got ‘seal’ and ‘ales’...

 

[DorsetDude]

View attachment 251541

My wife was injured in a laser accident. What is your problem?

 

[Jimi-the-fish]

Had a leaflet through my door saying 'Jumble Sale'.

So far I've got ‘seal’ and ‘ales’...

[emoji3]
And you can add 'leas' and 'lase' or is that last word inappropriate...

 

[Mr Badger]

The Ballad of Lidl and Aldi

I've no idea what that song was about at all... now excuse me while I try to put this hot glue gun, folding ladders and box of luxury Xmas stollen back in the cupboard!

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

An old woman is upset at her husband’s funeral. "You have him in a brown suit and I wanted him in a blue suit." The mortician says, "We’ll take care of it, ma’am," and yells to the back, "Ed, switch the heads on two and four!"

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[Tigger.ufo]

View attachment 251711

I thought Manuel was Spanish ....

 

[Nod]

I know nothing...

 

[AndrewFlannigan]

Que?

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7mpClSPyhk#action=share

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Cobra]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

There once was a man named Sweeney.
He spilled some gin on his weenie.
That being uncouth,
He dipped it in vermouth,
And slipped his wife a dry martini.

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[Cobra]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Mr Badger]

View attachment 251745

You can't beat amateur dramatics, I've always fancied having a part in Ryan's Daughter.

 

[mikew]

 

[mikew]