The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

All the whisky must have been drunk already!
 
The guys were all at a deer camp. No one wanted to camp with Bob because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn't fair to make just one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns.

The first guy slept in the tent with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. They said, "Man, what happened to you?

He said, "Bob snored so loudly, I just sat up and watched him all night."

The next night it was a different guy's turn. In the morning, same thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot. They said, "Man, what happened to you? You look awful!

He said, 'Man, that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night."

The third night was Paddy's turn. Paddy was a tanned, older cowboy, a man's man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. "Good morning!" he said.
They couldn't believe it. They said, "Man, what happened?"

He said, "Well, we got ready for bed. Then I went and tucked Bob into bed, patted him on the ass, and kissed him good night. Bob sat up and watched me all night."
 
We’ve just had a decorator in to do some work. I got chatting to him and it turns out that he’s a British Airways pilot who has been furloughed and earning a bit of extra cash.

He made a lovely job of the landing.
 
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