The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

dogspeak.jpg
 
Because people treat them like biscuits. Except they don't dunk them. Or snap them. Or use them as the base for cheesecake. Or charge VAT on them.

They're CAKES!
 
Oh Graham, I'm pinching that for FB, it's hilarious, she'd hate to be compared to the "Iron Lady"...
 
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If I were to sunbathe nekkid in my back garden, I could be done for indecency. If Mrs Nod did the same and a neighbour saw her, he could be done for peeping.
 
A good reason to "go" outside?

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Well, That's me in Hospital :(

This has not been a good Week.
After spending the last 12 months of lock downs, isolation, and going stir crazy I decided to go horse riding, something I haven't done in ages.
It turned out to be one big mistake!

I got on the horse and started out slowly, which was fine.
But then we went a little faster; before I knew it, we were going as fast as the horse could go.
I couldn't take the pace and fell off and caught my foot in the stirrup,

the horse was then going like the clappers with me on the ground with my foot stuck in the stirrup.
The horse just would not stop it was out of control I've never known anything like it.!


Thankfully the manager at Tesco came out and unplugged the machine.
He actually had the nerve to take the rest of my coins, so I wouldn't try to ride the machine again........
 
At our age (and weight!!!), those bloody things lurch rather than walk on smoothly.

Don't ask how I know - I think you probably know how I know!!!
 
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