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The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
- Thread starter Cobra
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A tiny wooden shed perched on a steep cliff in a scenic southern Chinese region has earned the nickname of “most inconvenient convenience store” in the country.
Hanging a whopping 120 meters (394 feet) above the ground, the two-square-meter shop replenishes climbers with drinks and light refreshments in the Shiniuzhai Scenic Area in the Chinese province of Hunan, according to a recent report by state-run English-language newspaper China Daily.
Nod
Tootles
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I had to search the BBC website for this and OMG, it is actually true. Got to be a late April Fool's windup though, surely?
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- Mike
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It seems she specializes in this sort of story. Also on BBC website we have:
Tollerton: Lorry 'almost squished car' after hitting low bridge
People living near the Nottinghamshire bridge say it is frequently hit by lorries.
www.bbc.co.uk
Network Rail urges drivers to stop hitting low bridge
Network Rail pleads with drivers of high vehicles to heed "low bridge" warning signs after the same bridge was hit 11 times in 12 months.
www.bbc.co.uk
At least they let her report on some other stories - flying drones https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-england-nottinghamshire-38365403 but even there they had to throw in some bridges!
When I was young, I could go down to the corner shop with £1 and I’d come home with a couple of tins of soup, two loaves of bread, half a dozen eggs, a pint of milk, a packet of biscuits, six cans of beer and a jar of coffee.
I couldn’t do that now…far too many security cameras.
I couldn’t do that now…far too many security cameras.
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Nod
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Tigger.ufo
Lady Penelope
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Can't believe my dad lost his job as a roadworker for stealing from them.
But when I went to see him last night all the signs were there.
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I tried blindfold archery. You should try it, you don't know what you're missing.
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Me: “How much does it cost to buy a large singing group?”
Her: “A choir?”
Me: “Ok, fine. How much does it cost to ‘acquire’ a large singing group.”
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But when I went to see him last night all the signs were there.
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I tried blindfold archery. You should try it, you don't know what you're missing.
___
Me: “How much does it cost to buy a large singing group?”
Her: “A choir?”
Me: “Ok, fine. How much does it cost to ‘acquire’ a large singing group.”
___
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A very successful farmer from Texas who traced his lineage back to a small town in Ireland decided to take a trip and visit some of his kin.
After landing in Dublin, and driving an hour outside of the city, he located a cousin’s home and knocked on the door and introduced himself.
Later that day, standing outside with one of his relatives The Texan asked his cousin to tell him about his homestead.
His cousin proudly smiling says “See that stone wall at the top of the rise? That’s the north edge, and the 3rd stone wall to the left is the west edge, and to the right the 4th wall is the east edge”. Then he asked his new found cousin to describe his farm in Texas.
The Texan smiled and said, “If you started out in the morning, and drove west, you could drive all day before you reached the end of my property. And if you started the next day and drove East all day, you wouldn’t reach the end of my property. Same thing North and South, you could drive either direction all day and you wouldn’t reach the end of my farmland”. What do you think of that?
His Irish cousin thought for a moment and then said, “Ahh, I think it sounds like you need a new truck.”
After landing in Dublin, and driving an hour outside of the city, he located a cousin’s home and knocked on the door and introduced himself.
Later that day, standing outside with one of his relatives The Texan asked his cousin to tell him about his homestead.
His cousin proudly smiling says “See that stone wall at the top of the rise? That’s the north edge, and the 3rd stone wall to the left is the west edge, and to the right the 4th wall is the east edge”. Then he asked his new found cousin to describe his farm in Texas.
The Texan smiled and said, “If you started out in the morning, and drove west, you could drive all day before you reached the end of my property. And if you started the next day and drove East all day, you wouldn’t reach the end of my property. Same thing North and South, you could drive either direction all day and you wouldn’t reach the end of my farmland”. What do you think of that?
His Irish cousin thought for a moment and then said, “Ahh, I think it sounds like you need a new truck.”
