The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

It was only a matter of time .................
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The Wife says I'm a typical, tight-fisted, man.
So to prove her wrong I took her out for Tea and Biscuits.
It was really quite exciting, as she had never given blood before.
 
I don't know where & when I saw this but if it was good enough to save then its getting another showing.

illegal immigrants are getting worse.

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And ....

Things you can get away with saying only at Christmas.
1. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
2. Smother the butter all over the breasts!
3. If I don't undo my trousers, I'll burst!
4. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
5. Stuff it up between the legs as far as it will go.
6. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
7. I didn't expect everyone to come at the same time!
8. You still have a little bit on your chin.
9. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
10. I'm so full, I've been gobbling nuts all morning.
 
I gotta admit this did make me smile

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Probably in a different way to how it makes her smile...

Probably! :p
 
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