The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

[Graham]

 

[kennethwfd]

 

[Nod]

View attachment 237740

Probably tastes like MuckDonald's!

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Steep]

So.. taking a dog named 'Shark' to the beach turned out not to be such a great idea after all.

 

[Steep]

Heard two women talking on the bus
Woman one "I'm getting my ar$e bleached"
Woman two "Really? I can't imagine your husband as a blonde"

 

[camerassassin]

 

[camerassassin]

Every time the doorbell rings, I can’t resist the uncontrollable urge to make a cream and meringue-based dessert.

It’s a Pavlovian response.

 

[Cobra]

It’s a Pavlovian response.

I've ordered the taxi for you

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Cobra]

 

[Steep]

 

[mikew]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Steep]

 

[Marc]

 

[Nod]

Only done that on Mrs Nod's feet - and it does work!!!

 

[Steep]

 

[Bobsyeruncle]

View attachment 237915

Thats not even funny

 

[Steep]

Thats not even funny

 

[Farmerjim]

What is vaccinate? Google translate couldn't help.

 

[StewartR]

What is vaccinate?

That's a great auto-correct failure.

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Deleted member 49428]

What is vaccinate? Google translate couldn't help.

Typically to inject a dead, inactivated or less potent type of virus that'll trick your immune system so you become immune to a decease.

 

[Nod]

Judging by...

That's a great auto-correct failure.

...Jim was pointing out that the original picture says "vacciante" rather than "vaccinate" but autocowrecked has automatically corrected a common typo when Jim tried to point it out.

 

[Nod]

And yes, I did spot your (almost) homophone.

 

[Farmerjim]

And yes, I did spot your (almost) homophone.

Oh no, not another homophobic post

 

[Nod]

Knot at awl!

 

[Cobra]

 

[Gremlin]

 

[Nod]

View attachment 237953

CAT scanned the pic and is unimpressed.

Cute Lab technician though - IMO!

 

[Steep]

 

[Mag1cp2x]

Typically to inject a dead, inactivated or less potent type of virus that'll trick your immune system so you become immune to a decease.

I'm fairly sure that noone's ever been completely immune to a 'decease'.

 

[Nod]

Shaun's mate Ed managed!

 

[mex]

There were 2 birds on a perch, one says to the other “ do you smell fish”

 

[Bobsyeruncle]

2 fish in a tank
One says to the other "how do you drive this thing"?

 

[Deleted member 49428]

I'm fairly sure that noone's ever been completely immune to a 'decease'.

Illness then. Smallpox, measles ETC. Oh and HPV and so forth

 

[Deleted member 49428]

Judging by...



...Jim was pointing out that the original picture says "vacciante" rather than "vaccinate" but autocowrecked has automatically corrected a common typo when Jim tried to point it out.

Aren't even able to make an honest mistake anymore

 

[Mr Badger]

I'm fairly sure that noone's ever been completely immune to a 'decease'.

Well, probably not for around the last 2,000 years or so.

 

[ianp5a]

So.. taking a dog named 'Shark' to the beach turned out not to be such a great idea after all.

True story that this reminded me of:
I thought I saw my friend Dai down the road. So I waved and called out to him. "Dai! Dai!" It turned out it wasn't Dai. Scared some bloke half to death.