The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

Now corrected! My only excuse is that I was looking at the button not the who likes this bar and the button said "Like". I iz eezilly confuszzulated!
 
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The Australian Poetry Competition had come down to two finalists; a university graduate and an old aboriginal. They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was 'TIMBUKTU'

First to recite his poem was the university graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

"Slowly across the desert sand,
Trekked a lonely caravan
Men on camels two by two
Destination - Timbuktu."

The crowd went crazy! No way could the old aboriginal top that, they thought.

The old aboriginal calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:
"Me and Tim a huntin' went,
Met three whores in a pop up tent,
They were three, and we was two
So I bucked one, and tim buktu
 
Soya bean, baked bean, vibrator - which is the odd one out?





Baked bean - The other two are meat substitutes


.
 
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The boss shows up at the office yesterday with a brand new Lamborghini. I ask, "Is this yours?!?!" He replies, "Yep, just picked it up yesterday!"

I respond, "Man, that is one sweet ride!"

He then says, "Well, I tell you what. If you show up for work every day, on time, put in a honest days labor, apply yourself, and work hard, in just two years.............. I'll be able to buy another one."
 
Mountkeen said:
I just used the vcuum clener on my keybord. Brillint.
Click to expand...
I used my Dyson on mine. I don't think I experienced your problems, but I'm not completely sure. I think I might need to modify my typing style in order to find out. If it's worth it, which it might not be. Let's be honest, I'm not seeing serious issues here, even though I've typed dozens of words. I might just be lucky in this respect.
 
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