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The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )
- Thread starter Cobra
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- Name
- Larry
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Prince Charles was driving around his mother’s estate when he accidentally ran over her favourite dog, a Corgi, crushing it to a pulp.
He got out of his Range Rover and sat down on the grass totally distraught.
The whole world was against him and now his mother would go ballistic.
Suddenly he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground.
He dug it up, polished it and immediately a Genie appeared.
"You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment, " said the Genie
" As a reward I shall grant you one wish."
"Well, " said the Prince, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this dog."
They walk over to the splattered remains of the dog.
"Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me..?" the Prince asked.
The Genie carefully looked at the remains and shook his head.
"This body is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life.
Is there something else you would like..?"
The Prince thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos.
"I was married to this beautiful woman called Diana, " said Prince Charles, showing the genie the first photo.
"But now I love this woman called Camilla, " and he showed the genie the second photo.
"You see Camilla isn’t beautiful at all, so do you think you can make Camilla as beautiful as Diana..?"
The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Ok, let’s have another look at that dog"
He got out of his Range Rover and sat down on the grass totally distraught.
The whole world was against him and now his mother would go ballistic.
Suddenly he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground.
He dug it up, polished it and immediately a Genie appeared.
"You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment, " said the Genie
" As a reward I shall grant you one wish."
"Well, " said the Prince, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this dog."
They walk over to the splattered remains of the dog.
"Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me..?" the Prince asked.
The Genie carefully looked at the remains and shook his head.
"This body is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life.
Is there something else you would like..?"
The Prince thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos.
"I was married to this beautiful woman called Diana, " said Prince Charles, showing the genie the first photo.
"But now I love this woman called Camilla, " and he showed the genie the second photo.
"You see Camilla isn’t beautiful at all, so do you think you can make Camilla as beautiful as Diana..?"
The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Ok, let’s have another look at that dog"
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- Jason
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совсем нет, товарищ
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пора ли еще водки?
- Messages
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- Jason
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это всегда время для водки
<Stands>
Россия—священная наша держава,
Россия—любимая наша страна.
Могучая воля, великая слава—
Твоё достоянье на все времена!
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спасибо революции за такой замечательный напиток и великому Ленину за гугл переводчик.
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- Jim
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Thanks comrades for finding something to make me do some research
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- dave
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A little known fact: During the time Alan Turing was working at Bletchley Park cracking the Enigma codes, his sister Kay provided drinks, snacks and sandwiches for him and his colleagues
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- Bob
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Groan!
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- Bob
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