The Official TP Funnies thread ( Jokes Memes etc )

[badlywornroy]

I grew up with Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope.
Now there’s no cash, no jobs, and no hope.
Please don’t let anything happen to Kevin Bacon.

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[Nod]

View attachment 359361

Sod the 12-24, 24-70 and 70-200 f/2.8s - that trio is my kind of holy trinity!!!

 

[Nod]

 

[Cobra]

 

[welshwizard645]

View attachment 359539

Yup, in my case the duvet cover had digested the rest of the wash......

 

[Cobra]

Yup, in my case the duvet cover had digested the rest of the wash......

It must be related to mine

 

[welshwizard645]

Sad breaking news from the tennis World. The man who devised the pairs game has died.

RIP Mick Stubbles.

 

[welshwizard645]

When I told my contractor I didn’t want carpeted steps he gave me a blank stare.

 

[welshwizard645]

My wife often compares me to Ryan Gosling.

She'll say "You're nothing like Ryan Gosling."

 

[Nod]

 

[Mountkeen]

Carrie Johnson will be 35 on her next Birthday.

It doesn't seem five minutes ago since was crawling around the Foreign Office on her hands and knees.

 

[Cockney]

 

[Cockney]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his crotch. A woman passing by remarks, "If you were any sort of a gentleman, you would lift your hat to a lady." He replies, "If you were any sort of a sexy lady, the hat would lift by
itself."

 

[Cockney]

 

[Nod]

 

[Steep]

 

[ancient_mariner]

 

[Petrochemist]

View attachment 359684

Surely that covers just about everything.

 

[Nod]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]

 

[BubbaUK]

Aah, the old Tech Support acronym, PICNIC - Problem In Chair Not In Computer

 

[gman]

 

[Cobra]

View attachment 359728

A boss years ago actually said that at a staff meeting! Although an R8 was his car of choice,
lots of twatt comments under peoples breath!

 

[welshwizard645]

A boss years ago actually said that at a staff meeting! Although an R8 was his car of choice,
lots of twatt comments under peoples breath!

I use the phrase AUDIOT quite a lot.....OH's brother doesn't like (audi owner)

 

[Mountkeen]

My wife got stung by a bee last night on the forehead.

She's at A&E now, Her face is all swollen and bruised.

She nearly died.

Thankfully, I was close enough to be able to hit the bee with my shovel.

 

[ancient_mariner]

I use the phrase AUDIOT quite a lot.....OH's brother doesn't like (audi owner)

I thought that was what you called people who buy a mains cable at £1000 for their amplifier.

 

[mj4456]

I thought that was what you called people who buy a mains cable at £1000 for their amplifier.

Cheapskates.

 

[AshleyC]

 

[Cockney]

 

[Cockney]

 

[Nod]

 

[G.K.Jnr.]