Anyone else now doing it in Inspector Clouseau accent
Then there's the Italian who comes to a British hotel. He is given the keys to his room and finds the bedding incomplete. So he calls the receptionist.
"I want two sheet"
"Use the toilet"
"No, I want two sheet on my bed"
"You sir, are one dirty SOB"
He comes to the restaraunt and takes his seat. There is only a knife and a spoon so he calls the waitress
"I wanna fork "
"How dare you"
"No, I wanna fork on the table"
"You do it in public as well?"
When the meal is served he checks it with the menu and calls another waitress over
"This is not what I ordered, I want two piece on my plate"
"We've had enough of you and your dirty habits"
"Mamma mia, I've had enough and and coming home!"